Dallas
Last night, Mrs. At Home and I saw a preview for Dallas the new series. Since it will be on in 2012 and we’ve lived in the Dallas area before, I figured I’d give some bullet points about Dallas and Texas in general so I could set the record straight on some things I know will be asked.
- No. Everybody in Dallas does not wear cowboy hats. Many people in Fort Worth do, however.
- No. Everybody in Dallas does not drive pickup trucks. Many people in Fort Worth do, however. And there are many more trucks on the road in East Texas than you will generally find elsewhere.
- People say they want to move to Texas. Then they say they want to move to Austin. You need to find out which - Austin is the capital of Texas, but it’s not Texas.
- The Dallas Cowboys are not America’s team. They’re not even Dallas’ team. Two reasons for this: ** Like most warm-weather cities, the Cowboys only have fans when they’re winning. When they’re losing, the weather is fine for golf. ** The Dallas Cowboys play in Arlington. Prior to that, they played in Irving. I think they played in the Cotton Bowl, which is in Dallas, long ago.
- Yes, there’s lots of oil in Texas. Many schools in East Texas have oil derricks on the school property.
- No, you can not drive from Dallas to El Paso and back in an afternoon. Yes, there have been shows which say this can be done.
- No, Dallas is not a bunch of tall buildings in the middle of a prairie. The Dallas/Fort Worth Metroplex is huge - with no traffic, it would still take you 90 minutes to get from one side of the metroplex to the other. Could be longer if you consider Greenville part of the Metroplex (Greenville does).
- Texas is not part of the South. It’s “a whole ‘nother country”. I’ve never lived in a place with so much national pride.
- As Texas is not part of the South, there’s no need to ask for sweet tea. There is only tea (and it’s sweet.)
- Yes, there really is a South Fork ranch. It’s in Murphy, which is a suburb of Dallas. It’s a real working ranch. My sister used to keep a horse there, and we used to go to a concert there every year.
- There is no Catholic or Protestant in Texas. There is no Baptist or Presbyterian. There is no Evangelical or Charismatic. There is no Atheist or Religious. There is only Ford and there is only Chevy. You must choose one when filling out our application for your drivers’ license, and the Texas Highway Patrol will give you the appropriate Calvin-peeing-on-the-other-logo sticker for your window.
- What’s bigger in Texas than the Dallas Cowboys is local high-school football. That’s big all over the state (as far as I’ve seen).
- Some towns in East Texas are small enough that they’re named after parts of counties (I went to North Lamar), and some school districts are named after two cities because neither of the cities would be big enough on its own. Examples include Alba-Golden, Como-Pickton, and Scurry-Rosser (where Mrs. At Home did go to a classroom where they had first and second grade in the same classroom). Near where I grew up, there was a school where the two counties were small enough to have their own school district. Delmar (Delta and Lamar). Having sufficiently large schools is vital to high-school football.
- There is barbecue in Texas, but it’s different than elsewhere. In Texas, any dead or mostly dead animal roasted over a fire is barbecue. What is called brisket other places is known in Texas as barbecue brisket (even if it came from the oven) and is only to be eaten on Sunday after church (which is dinner - even at noon - because lunch comes in a paper bag).
- The national game of Texas is 42. Mrs. At Home and I would love to show you how to play. The longer you’ve been married, the better you automatically are at it.
